The 9th Soul

“I’m dying… and I love her…” – kawai5210

Posted in health, health defects, life by Fated Blue on April 7, 2010

My day ends in grief. I was happily browsing Pex when I chanced upon a very interesting thread titled “I’m dying… and I love her…“. It’s this thread made by kawai5210, a terminally ill man who suffers from leukemia. The flames of his love for one member, mistyblue2852, suddenly grew brighter than the sun as he wished to convey his true feelings for her.

I’ll be quoting some of their posts to document this love story we all often associate with books or movies. Please read the thread if you are interested on how the story developed.

kawai started with

Hi guys!

My girl na na-meet ako dito sa pex and we became friends. Naging constant ang communication namin. Pex, fb, ym, sms, and tinatawagan ko sya and sya rin naman.
What happened now is eto, I love her yes, but hindi ko masabi sa kanya dahil sa sitwasyon ko.
Three months ago I found out that I only have less than a year to stay with the living… At first ‘di ko matanggap coz I’m only 27yrs old but at the end I accepted it na and thinking na it’s God’s plan…

Problema ko kung paano ko sasabihin sa kanya ang lahat lalo na yung nararamdaman ko sa kanya. Dapat ba na malaman pa nya na I’m inlove with her? Ayoko rin naman na masaktan sya sa huli. But I have this wish na gusto ko sanang nasa tabi ko sya when I took my last breathe…

I’m planning to give her a surprise visit. Nasa Taiwan kasi sya and ang tagal na rin naman nya akong ini-invite mag-tour duon. Ipapasyal daw nya ko sa buong Taiwan.

Guys, dapat ba na sabihin kong mahal ko sya?
Kailan at paano ang tamang pagkakataon na gawin ito?

Ang hirap pero masaya ako sa nangyayari dahil nararamdaman kong buhay pa’ko dahil sa problemang ito.

Thanks!

As you can see, his is a post wherein you normally wouldn’t take as something from the hands of a dying man. He’s happy that he still has time to say the three words he always felt for this young woman. He went to Taiwan to see her personally for the first time since they started communicating with each other online and thru SMS.

I quote misty

kumusta po sa lahat. all i can say is thanks for all your support and prayers kay kawai.
sana po lagi pa rin natin syang isama sa mga prayers natin. ok naman po yung first meeting namin kanina. hindi ko lang po napigilan umiyak. but the rest of our first meeting is masaya and memorable.
siguro sya na lang po magkukuwento sa inyo. gusto ko lang po sya i-surprise sa post ko dito kasi alam nya hindi ako magpopost. hindi nya dinala yung laptop nya kasi ako na nagsabi yung laptop ko na gamitin nya dito.
nakita ko puro songs na.

so kawai, here is my song for you

Love Moves In Mysterious Ways
-MYMP-

Who’d have thought this is how the pieces fit
You and I shouldn’t even try making sense of it
I forgot how we ever came this far
I believe we had reasons but I don’t know what they are
So blame it on my heart oh

Love moves in mysterious ways
It’s always so surprising
When love appears over the horizon
I’ll love you for the rest of my days
But still it’s a mystery
How you ever came to me
Which only proves
Love moves in mysterious ways

Heaven knows love is just a chance we take
We make plans but then love demands a leap of faith
So hold me close and never ever let me go
‘Coz even though we think we know which way the river flows
That’s not the way love goes no

Like the ticking of a clock two hearts beat as one
But I’ll never understand the way it’s done.. oh

“Love moves… in mysterious ways….

i love you too and thank you for loving me this much…

From kawai

Haha! Ayan ha, at least I can say na talagang sinagot ako ni Misty. Kayo pa ang nakabasa.

Misty, I love you too and you don’t know how thankful I am for sharing all this wonderful moments with you….

Ok na sana yung lakad namin kanina kaya lang while we were talking sa park, nagjo-joke ako and she’s laughing, pagtingin nya sa akin bigla syang yumakap ng mahigpit and umiyak habang kinuha nya yung hanky nya. She wiped the blood na lumabas sa nose ko…
Dyahi nga eh… Sabi ko na lang kasama pa naman nya ako ‘wag muna sya umiyak ng ganun saka mamatay na yata ako sa sobrang higpit nung yakap nya…
Kaso no effect, ‘di na tumigil sa pag-iyak… Hinayaan ko na lang hanggang natapos din…
After naman nuon naging ok na uli. Lagi na lang daw sya naka-ready if ever na mag-nosebleed uli ako because ayaw naman nya ako makita ng iba na ganun yung itsura ko..
I’ll tell you guys ang sarap mag-alaga ni Misty.

Kanina she introduced me sa mga friends nya as her boyfriend. I’m so proud na ako yun and I can see those jealous eyes na nakatingin sa amin na mga suitors nya. Well, na-meet ko rin yung mga friends nya na nanliligaw sa kanya. By the way, yun yung naging thread nya dito kasi after her break up with her ex and after malaman nung mga kaibigan nyang guys na wala na syang bf sila naman yung nanligaw.
Nalungkot naman si Misty so ayun, gumawa sya ng thread dito sa dilemma and isa ako sa nakabasa noon. At duon na nagsimula ang lahat…

Sa mga nagtatanong if I kissed her na of course asked ko muna sya if ok lang sabihin ko dito. So ok lang daw.

Pagdating ko dito sa Taiwan, I saw her sa receiving ng arrival area. Ang nangyari nung magkaharap na kami, wala agad nakapagsalita sa aming dalawa tapos nakita ko nag-teary eyed na sya and she hugged me ng mahigpit saka nya ibinulong na she loves me too. Haha! ‘di ko na rin napigilan na maiyak kasi sobrang ang saya ko na marinig ko mismo sa kanya na mahal nya ako!
Yahooooooooo!!!!!
And then I look in her eyes saka naglakas loob ako to kiss her and she accepted my kiss naman with smile on her face… Wala na nga akong naging pakialam na nasa airport pa pala kami and ang daming tao. Haha!

I’m using her laptop kasi ‘di ko dinala yung laptop ko. So wala syang computer ngayon sa unit nya…

Pero maya-maya lang dapat matulog na’ko kasi mapapagalitan nya ako if makita nyang sobrang late na akong matulog. Makikita nya kasi yung time ng pag-post ko dito…

Well guys, thank you so much uli for all the support and prayers ninyo para sa aming dalawa. Sabi nga nya sana nangyari nga ito minus the dying part daw… Gagawin ko na lang ang lahat para maging ready sya sa pag-alis ko…
But still, I’m hoping na kahit paano hindi man ako totally gumaling, sana madagdagan na lang yung time na pwede ko pa syang makasama ng matagal… Isa ito sa mga hinihiling ko kay God…

And sorry guys, kasi ang pictures lang na mapo-post ko is yung mga places na mapupuntahan ko minus our faces. Siguro meron but malayo kami…. Sorry guys ha, gusto ko lang din kasi i-keep yung identity namin. Ok na kilala nyo kami as Kawai and Misty and as I’ve said may mga friends din ako na nagpe-pex so I’m just being careful na malaman nila yung condition ko.. Hope you understand…

Good Friday na tomorrow… Vacation pala ngayon no? Sana maging ok ang holy week ninyo…

Part by part na lang siguro yung pagkwento ko kung paano kami nagkakilala hanggang ngayon dito sa mga mangyayari. Ok ba yun?

Always take care everybody and Godbless….

Everything went swell for the two of them. They went touring in Taiwan, sight seeing, dating, shared a teary moment here and there. But all in all, all time spent is not wasted.

He then kept posting and posting all the moments they shared with each other

Good morning everyone!!!

Today is Good Friday, later Misty and I will go to church… Magiging isa ito sa everyday na gagawin namin, she wants us na sabay kaming magpe-pray kay God… Hihingi daw sya ng maraming extensions kay God para sa akin…

Kayo ano plano ninyo today? Kung diyan sa atin mainit dito hindi pa tapos ang winter. Malamig pa rin. Well, a hug from her will keep me warm. Haha!Nagluluto sya ngayon ng breakfast! Ang aga ko kaninang lumipat dito sa unit nya syempre I want to start my day na siya agad ang makikita ko.Pasensya na sa inyo ha kung nagiging corny ako pero ang sarap ng pakiramdam maging corny! Haha!

Tonight try ko na mag-post ng pictures…

Thank you sa inyong lahat… Sa mga prayers ninyo sa amin ni Misty..
Sa totoo lang naiisip ko, yeah, parang sa movie lang itong nangyayari na ‘to but eto, sa akin pa mismo nangyayari. Sana wala munang maging ‘the end’

Sige ingat kayo lagi and Godbless…

Good evening…

How’s your Friday? Hope you’re all doin’ fine.
As i’ve promised magpopost ako ng pictures… Ito yung ipopost ko kasi ito yung for me pinakamasayang moment ko with Misty…

We’re inside the cable car… Maokong, Taipei yung place nya.
Sobrang peaceful ng feeling ko while we’re riding the cable car… Nakasandal lang sya sa dibdib ko while nakayakap ako sa kanya. I even closed my eyes and that time I thank God for giving me that moment with her… Wala na’kong mahihiling pa… Sabi ko kay God ‘thank you for this… sobra sobra na yung ibinibigay Mo sa akin… whatever Your plan for the two of us. Ikaw na ang bahala… basta thank you…’
Sige para sa magtatanong if i kissed her, syempre! Sobrang romantic ng place eh kaya kiniss nya ako. Ay mali! ako pala nagkiss sa kanya.. Haha! Aray! ayan nakurot ako!

Eto, I want you to meet Euro… Misty’s makulit na dog..

Ang cute nya no?

And here is Misty’s place…

Duon sya sa 9th floor..

Sige kain muna kami ng dinner…
Yeah, nakakatuwa na yung naiisip nyo na sana maging ending nito…
Sana…

Thank you sa inyong lahat ha…

Godbless….

Of course, there were skeptics if the whole love story is true. Someone posted:

sana totoo sinasabi mo sa mga post kasi were in a forum. para pang pelikula mga post mo.

To which kawai replied

At first, all I wanted is to post my problem here since wala akong mapagsabihan dahil hindi naman alam ng mga close friends ko ang situation ko. Ayoko rin naman nila malaman. And I know madaming makakapagbigay ng mga sensible advises dito…

Kahit ako hindi makapaniwala sa bilis ng mga pangyayari.. Now I’m here in Taiwan with Misty… Napag-uusapan nga namin ni Misty na yung nangyayari sa amin parang sa movies lang napapanood yung mga ganitong happenings… Pero eto, mismong sa aming dalawa nangyayari.
All we wanted now is maging masaya lahat ng pagsasamahan namin… Sabi nya nga sa akin..
“Gusto ko puro happy memories yung mabuo natin kasi para oras na iwanan mo na ‘ko, babalikan ko lang yung masasayang panahon na kasama kita… masasaktan ako oo pero sa tulong ng mga happy memories na yun, siguro, sana, magiging madali sa akin dalhin lahat ng ito..” I really don’t know kung sinabi nya ‘to para hindi ako mag-alala sa hinaharap at ipaalam nya sa akin na matatag sya sa anumang dadating… Pero mas lalo kong naramdaman na tama lahat ng desisyon na ginawa kong puntahan sya dito… For 2days na nakakasama ko na sya mas lalong nadadagdagan yung love ko for her…

I continued to post here kasi I’m really happy and sobrang blessed ako na isinasama ninyo ako and si Misty sa mga prayers ninyo. I felt na siguro ok rin na malaman ninyo yung mangyayari.. And patuloy na magpasalamat sa inyong lahat…

But I really don’t know kung hanggang kailan ako magpopost dito…
Kasi ‘di ba solved na yung problem ko with her? Sabay na lang kaming umaasa na sana kahit paano magkaroon pa’to ng medyo mahabang extension..

But hindi matatapos yung pag thank you ko sa inyo.. Kahit hindi na ‘ko makakapagpost, here in my mind and my heart andun yung pasasalamat sa inyo…

A few updates of his unfortunate shortened love life followed

Here’s another picture.. Sa Changhua naman ito bandang center ng Taiwan. Top sya ng mountain. Bagwasan tawag sa place pero kung sabihin nila Pakwasan…

Theres’ a tragic story sa place na’to. Bukas ko na ikukuwento. Mapapagalitan na’ko anong time na gising pa’ko..

Gudnyt sa lahat!!!

Thank you, ipapabasa ko kay Misty ‘to..
Bukas pa kasi nasa unit na nya sya. Nasa akin na naman ‘yong laptop nya.
Alam mo ba ikaw yung reason kung bakit inaway-away ako ni Misty? Kasi niloloko ko sya na nag-post sya ng thread sa dilemma tapos parang ‘di ba naglolokohan na kayo dun about ikaw yung ex nya and sya yung ex mo. Naalala ko pa!
Sabi ko naghahanap lang yata sya ng bf… Ang sama ko no? Hindi, binibiro ko lang kasi sya nuon.
Alam ko naman friends kayo and kinuwento nga nya sa akin na nung malaman mo yung about sa car accident nya talagang tinawagan mo pa sya nuon but ‘di daw nya nasagot..
Ikaw din yung sinabi nya na naging unang friend nya dito sa pex. Malaki rin daw yung naitulong mo sa problem nya kasi may nakakausap sya nuon and ikaw nga yun…
Thank you…

Wala akong masabi sa kanya pare, nung maging close na kami naramdaman ko na yung pagiging mabait nya then eto nakikita ko yung totoong sya, lahat yata ng tao sa bldg na tinitirhan nya kilala sya. Basta makikita na sya nakangiti agad sa kanya and binabati sya. Si manong guard grabe pag-alalay, feeling ko nga crush ni manong guard si Misty. Haha! ‘di ako nagseselos ha!
Then yung mga kaibigan nyang pinoy dito ang dami. Maya’t-maya panay ring ng phone puro inaaya sya sa mga lakad kung gusto daw sumama..
Inasar ko nga sabi ko layas ka pala dito ha!
Hindi naman daw, gusto lang daw kasi nung mga yun na andun sya.
And the best magluto ng white spaghetti si Misty!
Lalo tuloy ako naiinlove dito sa baby ko…

Lemon, sana kahit paano if wala na ako kahit pm lang for her, palakasin mo uli loob nya ha….

Ingat lagi and Godbless…

Again, sa lahat ng mga nag-post and sa mga prayers ninyo, maraming salamat..

Kaya patuloy pa rin ako magpopost dito ng mga mangyayari sa amin at least para malaman nyo na yung mga prayers nyo nagbibigay sa amin ng strength ni misty…
Sa akin na nagbibigay ng lakas para makita ko pa yung mga smiles nya..
Kaya salamat talaga sa inyo…

Happy Easter sa inyong lahat!

This was taken yesterday at Leofoo village. Parang Enchanted Kingdom ‘tong place na’to…
Madami ring rides but mas masarap magpunta dito sa place na’to.. tahimik kasi…
Si Misty ang hilig magpicture.. ginawa na nga akong model!
Ang sarap talaga guys kapag kasama mo ang buhay mo…

Always take care to all and Godbless…

Until finally, he chose to stop posting because of another skeptic who replied with

hope somebody can vouch if kawai is real or just an imagination of misty.

to which kawai replied (for the last time)

Kung pwede nga lang talaga na ipost ko yung pictures namin I would love to… But pasensya na… May ilang pexer ako na pinadalhan ng picture namin because I believed na sila yung mas nagbigay ng encouragement para maging happy ako with her ngayon…

Nahihiya ako kay misty na parang iba na yung naiisip sa kanya dito… So siguro this will be my last post… She told me na isa ito sa mga babalikan nyang basahin when I’m gone and I don’t want her na makabasa ng ganito…

Thank you guys for all your prayers…

Jazzmine thank you…

Sir blue_tracer thank you…

And sa inyong lahat…. Sa mga prayers and encouragement…
Thank you…

Isa lang ang natutunan ko dito, na basta nagmahal ka ng totoo walang imposible…

Yeah, all I can do is i-enjoy every single moment with her kasi alam ko hindi naman magtatagal ‘to… Nararamdaman ko na rin kasi eh…

This coming week my family will be here to meet her and magkasama-sama kami dito…

Guys thank you again…
Thank you for sharing with me the happiness na nararamdaman ko now that I’m with her…

Always take care and Godbless to all of you…

Everyone was happy praying for him and misty. They all wished them the best love has to offer. Everyone was very happy up until tonight, April 6 2010, 9:32 PM, misty sent a message to one of her close friends in Pex

Heartbreaking News..

Misty sent me a PM.

She said, sinugod daw nila si Kawai sa hospital today, he is still unconscious as of this moment.

Kawai needs our prayers.

===============================

I’ve always wanted to write something of a tragic romance. I’ve always imagined a love life which ends in bitter sweetness. With this thread, and the couple involved in it, I’ve realized that the perfect love story doesn’t come from imagination or years of painstaking research and editing. The perfect love story comes from our own life. A dying man willed himself to express his greatest gratitude to God and the woman he loves.

I never thought a dying man would make me feel so alive.

7 Responses

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  1. Sha said, on April 7, 2010 at 12:44 am

    ouch! ouch! I cried. =( You did justice anima. great job. Hope Kawai and Misty get to read this soon. My prayers are with them.

  2. Jazzmine said, on April 7, 2010 at 5:06 pm

    Anima, this is very touching..thank you for inspiring us with this blog entry. Kawai’s life is in God’s hands now.

  3. Jazzmine said, on April 8, 2010 at 9:08 pm

    Kawai passed away past 3pm today..his remains will be cremated.

    Goodbye Kawai, thank you, I will never forget you.

  4. [...] on April 8, 2010 I haven’t logged in Pex all day and this is the news I get. I made a blog about him recently to spread his positive outlook despite his unfortunate [...]

  5. L said, on April 17, 2010 at 9:45 pm

    Oh. I didn’t know this was for real. Very sad indeed. :-( RIP, Kawai.

  6. laura said, on May 8, 2010 at 11:54 am

    i’m so very saddened when i first read the story of kawai at pex then biglang nag-server error, im glad you made a blog about their story..i cried tlaga sayang nga lang di ako nka-visit sa pex nung time na nagstart ung thread ni kawai….

  7. Juriz said, on June 26, 2012 at 7:25 pm

    Just came across this. Did they share the girl’s Facebook account password? I’m a little surprised by the fact that all of the pictures allegedly posted by the guy are from a woman’s facebook account. I may be one of the skeptical ones, but it doesn’t help bolster their case.


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