The 9th Soul

Reading my old Yahoo! Inbox

Posted in Uncategorized by Fated Blue on December 3, 2020

If I were to trace back the first time I told myself I will likely be single for the rest of my life, it would have to be during my first year in college, shorty after realizing that the girl I had a thing for had other prospects in mind.

Being 16, I think that kinda stirred me to a rather “irregular” trajectory as far as coping with being in love was concerned. What it ultimately lead to was me actively suppressing anything that would betray this emotion I just didn’t know how to use.
The suppression made me react to my “feelings” in an unorthodox and annoying manner, which ends up becoming more of a pushing force than something that would reel someone in.

I’m writing this now because I was looking at REALLY old emails from my practically dead Yahoo! inbox, and I realized that at some point, I was in good terms with the girl I gave a frying pan to – that we once were part of the same group of friends and that we worked together on school projects before.
I don’t really remember this part of my life, but now it’s making me feel…disturbed.

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